Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Monday, November 28, 2011

The City's not my Home

The city's not my home.
Not the heavy thundering traffic
that crawl from day to night
from road to road
blocking street to street
and zooming highways and byways.
Not the smog and haze and cough mixture
of frustration and aggravation and indecision.
Not the unscheduled transports
that grind my hours into days
to get something done
while getting nothing done.
The runaround and the merry-go-round
and the screw around of that awful sound.
The city's not my home
where trees are uprooted to make way for cars,
to widen roads and to dig more tunnels.
Nature is obliterated, annihilated and eradicated.
For houses, for mansions, for condos
for those who pay with lies and deceit.
The city's not my home,
that's why I've gone back to the town
where trees are abundant,
wildlife is plentiful,
air is invigorating,
and humans are few.
But how long will my home last
before someone bludgeons
it with the grief of the city,
the agony of triviality,
and the vile smell of pride?

Bee having a go at a Rambutan

Kingfisher up in the Rambutan tree

Rambuts rambuts everywhere

Thursday, November 24, 2011

Quote of the Day

Art is beautiful when it comes from the heart
but when you slap a price tag to it and start the bidding war
it can be one of the most irrational things you'll ever see

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Monday, November 21, 2011

Be not a Hypocrite unto Thyself

Love the sinner but hate the sin; well ain't that the biggest bullshit ever.
It's like a vegetarian saying I'm vegetarian but I like chicken soup.
It's like you lover saying 'I respect you too much to want to have sex with you'.
It's like the man who tells his daughter not to say the word 'fuck' but he goes and cheat on his wife.
It's like a woman who hates the word 'bitch' but that is exactly what she calls other women she hates.
It's like a believer of god saying 'I tolerate other religions' but he prays for them to convert.
It's like the pious telling you not to use god's name in vain and yells 'Oh God, Oh God!' when having sex.
It's like politicians telling you they care for you and spend all your money on their monthly vacation.
It's like the government hugging you but screwing you at the same time.
It's like saying I hate his pedophilic acts but we'll ignore it since he's a priest.
It's like a man saying 'I'm not gay, but I get really excited when I see naked men'.

I'm just sayin' it...

The untold story of Madam Lai Kwan

Where is your heart Mitshubishi? Where is your heart?

Thursday, November 17, 2011

Quote of the day

When you are ignorant
your world remains belligerent

Quote of the Day

Once you are a victim, 
there's a great chance that you might become the perpetrator

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Save the Internet!


It always starts with something small and then before you know it it's 1984 all over again. Or Equilibruim or Fahrenheit 451 or Gattaca or THX 1138.

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

How much do you Love Someone?

I was sitting in my sister's room working on my laptop on a makeshift table rewriting the Inspector Dores Mystery when the rains came unexpectedly. My father came in from the opposite room to close one of the windows that was most likely to let in the rain. Since the windows were tinted my father switched on the lights for me when it got a little darker and walked away.

I was so moved by his gesture it reminded me of 'Christmas Day in the Morning' by Pearl S. Buck. (http://www.allthingschristmas.com/stories/InTheMorning.html) If you've never read this small but inspiring story you must must give it a go. It will make you a better person whether you want it to or not.

And if you truly love someone with all your heart remember it is always the small things that matter. Below is the story:

Christmas Day in the Morning
By Pearl S. Buck

He woke suddenly and completely. It was four o'clock, the hour at which his father had always called him to get up and help with the milking. Strange how the habits of his youth clung to him still! Fifty years ago, and his father had been dead for thirty years, and yet he waked at four o'clock in the morning. He had trained himself to turn over and go to sleep, but this morning it was Christmas, he did not try to sleep.

Why did he feel so awake tonight? He slipped back in time, as he did so easily nowadays. He was fifteen years old and still on his father's farm. He loved his father. He had not known it until one day a few days before Christmas, when he had overheard what his father was saying to his mother.

"Mary, I hate to call Rob in the mornings. He's growing so fast and he needs his sleep. If you could see how he sleeps when I go in to wake him up! I wish I could manage alone."

"Well, you can't, Adam." His mother's voice was brisk. "Besides, he isn't a child anymore. It's time he tok his turn."

"Yes," his father said slowly. "But I sure do hate to wake him."

When he heard these words, something in him spoke: his father loved him! He had never thought of that before, taking for granted the tie of their blood. Neither his father nor his mother talked about loving their children--they had no time for such things. There was always so much to do on the farm.

Now that he knew his father loved him, there would be no loitering in the mornings and having to be called again. He got up after that, stumbling blindly in his sleep, and pulled on his clothes, his eyes shut, but he got up.

And then on the night before Christmas, that year when he was fifteen, he lay for a few minutes thinking about the next day. They were poor, and most of the excitement was in the turkey they had raised themselves and mince pies his mother made. His sisters sewed presents and his mother and father always bought him something he needed, not only a warm jacket, maybe, but something more, such as a book. And he saved and bought them each something, too.

He wished, that Christmas when he was fifteen, he had a better present for his father. As usual he had gone to the ten-cent store and bought a tie. It had semed nice enough until he lay thinking the night before Christmas. He looked out of his attic window, the stars were bright.

"Dad," he had once asked when he was a little boy, "What is a stable?"

"It's just a barn," his father had replied, "like ours."

Then Jesus had been born in a barn, and to a barn the shepherds had come...

The thought struck him like a silver dagger. Why should he not give his father a special gift too, out there in the barn? He could get up early, earlier than four o'clock, and he could creep into the barn and get all the milking done. He'd do it alone, milk and clean up, and then when his father went in to start the milking he'd see it all done. And he would know who had done it. He laughed to himself as he gazed at the stars. It was what he would do, and he musn't sleep too sound.

He must have waked twenty times, scratching a match to look each time to look at his old watch -- midnight, and half past one, and then two o'clock.

At a quarter to three he got up and put on his clothes. He crept downstairs, careful of the creaky boards, and let himself out. The cows looked at him, sleepy and surprised. It was early for them, too.

He had never milked all alone before, but it seemed almost easy. He kept thinking about his father's surprise. His father would come in and get him, saying that he would get things started while Rob was getting dressed. He'd go to the barn, open the door, and then he'd go get the two big empty milk cans. But they wouldn't be waiting or empty, they'd be standing in the milk-house, filled.

"What the--," he could hear his father exclaiming.

He smiled and milked steadily, two strong streams rushing into the pail, frothing and fragrant.

The task went more easily than he had ever known it to go before. Milking for once was not a chore. It was something else, a gift to his father who loved him. He finished, the two milk cans were full, and he covered them and closed the milk-house door carefully, making sure of the latch.

Back in his room he had only a minute to pull off his clothes in the darkness and jump into bed, for he heard his father up. He put the covers over his head to silence his quick breathing. The door opened.

"Rob!" His father called. "We have to get up, son, even if it is Christmas."

"Aw-right," he said sleepily.

The door closed and he lay still, laughing to himself. In just a few minutes his father would know. His dancing heart was ready to jump from his body.

The minutes were endless -- ten, fifteen, he did not know how many -- and he heard his father's footsteps again. The door opened and he lay still.


"Yes, Dad--"

His father was laughing, a queer sobbing sort of laugh.

"Thought you'd fool me, did you?" His father was standing by his bed, feeling for him, pulling away the cover.

"It's for Christmas, Dad!"

He found his father and clutched him in a great hug. He felt his father's arms go around him. It was dark and they could not see each other's faces.

"Son, I thank you. Nobody ever did a nicer thing--"

"Oh, Dad, I want you to know -- I do want to be good!" The words broke from him of their own will. He did not know what to say. His heart was bursting with love.

He got up and pulled on his clothes again and they went down to the Christmas tree. Oh what a Christmas, and how his heart had nearly burst again with shyness and pride as his father told his mother and made the younger children listen about how he, Rob, had got up all by himself.

"The best Christmas gift I ever had, and I'll remember it, son every year on Christmas morning, so long as I live."

They had both remembered it, and now that his father was dead, he remembered it alone: that blessed Christmas dawn when, alone with the cows in the barn, he had made his first gift of true love.

This Christmas he wanted to write a card to his wife and tell her how much he loved her, it had been a long time since he had really told her, although he loved her in a very special way, much more than he ever had when they were young. He had been fortunate that she had loved him. Ah, that was the true joy of life, the ability to love. Love was still alive in him, it still was.

It occured to him suddenly that it was alive because long ago it had been born in him when he knew his father loved him. That was it: Love alone could awaken lovve. And he ccould give the gift again and again.This morning, this blessed Christmas morning, he would give it to his beloved wife. He could write it down in a letter for her to read and keep forever. He went to his desk and began his love letter to his wife: My dearest love...

A Lesson in Life from 127 Hours

This rock...this rock has been waiting for me my entire life. It's entire life. Ever since it was a bit of meteorite a million, billion years ago. There in space. It's been waiting, to come here. Right, right here. I've been moving towards it my whole life. The minute I was born, every breath I've taken, every action has been leading me to this crack on the out surface.
127 hours is a biopic about a man, Aron Ralston, who got his hand stuck in a rock. You might wonder what is so great about a movie like this. Well, for one it has James Franco in it, and two, it's deeper than you can imagine. Like the quotation above many of us go about our lives doing everything that we can to reach this 'rock' of ours and when we finally do we ask the wrong question: Why me? instead of the right one: Why did I want to come here?

What I Learned Today: The Day Frank lost his Miller


From the horse's mouth on the Occupy movement:
“Occupy” is nothing but a pack of louts, thieves, and rapists, an unruly mob, fed by Woodstock-era nostalgia and putrid false righteousness.

This is no popular uprising. This is garbage.

...go home to your parents, you losers.
 Is this the first sign of dementia?

Monday, November 14, 2011

Occupying that little space called Earth

Sometimes I get so disgusted with people who tell me they spend RM500 on a dress or RM200 on their hair or RM1500 on a hand phone or RM800 on food or something or rather that they are so proud of to have spent that kind of money for their pleasure. Knowing that some families could survive for a few months with RM1000 makes me sick when I hear all these. Maybe that's why I'm such a misanthrope, finding fewer and fewer people I want to be friends with and who want to be friends with me.

I live in a low cost apartment in PJ where most families are of the low income group and foreigners who share an entire apartment with 3 bedrooms or a shop lot with only a hall. Their meals are simple and life is purely survival. Since the exterior of the apartment is something getting used to, because of the filth, I realise I am able to move out of the place anytime I feel like it, which is by end of this year. But when I see families who are stuck there for more reasons than one I feel so disheartened by this so called distribution of wealth and where the line of poverty is drawn. No one knows the true facts and figures because they are all hyped up or watered down.Where is the assistance? Where is the education?

Eating meat is still considered a luxury and especially the poor are duped into buying them to supplement a decent meal. Also, unnecessary purchases of commercial products which serve no purpose, are drummed into their heads to make it top priority. Most of the people at the apartment where I live don't speak English and life is a day to day endurance just to make ends meet.

While I myself find it difficult to contribute a solution I know this imbalance is going to tip over one day. So is it any wonder why http://www.occupytogether.org exist?

What I Learned Today: Exploding Head Syndrome


I just found out that there is such a thing known as this. The syndrome itself sounds like a title of a horror story or movie. Perhaps I will write a story based on this incredible condition. Isn't science wonderful? I mean dreadful.

Saturday, November 12, 2011

What I Learned Today: Tanka

Tanka: A form of Japanese poetry; the 1st and 3rd lines have five syllables and the 2nd, 4th, and 5th have seven syllables (Wordweb)


I look through the lens
of someone's eyes like my own
but I cannot see
with the blood of animals
and the tears of fallen trees

Friday, November 11, 2011

What I Learned Today: The Great Embrace

Today is the second wave of the Great Embrace.


Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Farid & the Supernatural Sleuths in the making

Illustrated cover by Edwin Kho. A planned children's novels/animation series.

Dreams: Doors & Levels

I was invited to a house with many doors and levels. Some doors were slightly ajar but some were locked. There were shows, performances, artist's gallery, studios, kitchens and cafeterias. People were moving everywhere in haste. I took a walk to see my ex students staging a play and got lost in the maze of corridors. And I couldn't find my way back. I tried every door I could see but it was always the wrong one until I saw this man who came out of a very inconspicuous door which lead me back to where I was going. He told me to lock it well because it was a secret door that none should use as a shortcut.

Tuesday, November 8, 2011

What's Your Purpose?

Why was I born with a crooked spine?
I ask myself sometimes.
It makes it hard for me to sit upright,
It makes it hard for me to stand for long.
At night when I sleep, I toss and turn
to find the right spot to catch a cradle song.
I wake up with a variety of headaches
That range from subtle throbs to loquacious poundings,
My bowels are always a constant battle,
Cos' moving it always needs a little coaxing.
I've always believed in purposes in our lives,
Be it a simple gesture of love or compassion.
While we carry baggage of all shapes and sizes,
The end comes sooner than we'd like to imagine.
Despite pain or agony some people strive for gold,
Making life easier for you and me and all the rest.
But sometimes, comes someone, who makes it old,
As though life is nothing but a series of mandatory tests.
What's your purpose, where do you go?
Do you have a home, how far do you roam?
What's your purpose, what do you do?
Do you strip someone naked to see his hue?
What's your purpose, do you want to be a superstar?
Do you spread joy or do you leave behind scars?
What's your purpose, are you timid or are you bold?
Would it make any difference if you were born without a soul?

Monday, November 7, 2011

An Interview with my Desire


Thanks Melissa.

Sunday, November 6, 2011

Today we Begin

Some days you see the light coming through your window,
Some days you see darkness that leaves you with all its horror.
Sometimes you just want to stay in bed and fornicate with sorrow,
But some days you want to wake up to a new day and live forever.

These are the days
These are the times
You decide to make
You decide to break

News of dying and news of death
News of the wealthy and news of health
Songs of sadness and songs of love
Can you sing when your heart's about to burst?

Some nights are made of dreams and creations,
Some nights are nightmarish and filled with indignation.
Some of us are full of fire and generous with our desires,
Some of us all watered down and quickly to fold and retire.

These are the days gone bad.
These are the times gone sour.
Your option is to be happy or to be sad,
You can count them in minutes or by the hour.

News of madness, news of insanity,
News of progress, news of calamity.
Mother Nature is simple and all that she is,
But human nature is marked with some kind of disease.

Some days I'm a grouch with the world on my shoulders,
Some days I'm an angel of hope to all the lovers,
Some days we begin to love and understand,
Today we can start by listening and just be a friend.

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

What I Learned Today: People do change

I read in the news article about a reformed skinhead and found the story amazing and inspiring.